Or, As the Ankle Turns. This guy’s a goddamn soap opera wrapped in a reality show wrapped in an ankle brace. For the 2nd time in 2 years, Michael (practice? PRACTICE?? We’re not talking GAME. Practice???) Crabtree hurt himself on the 1st day of practice. Year one of course was the Year of the Holdout. This guys is a walking Alan Iverson in shoulder pads. You know Crabtree. The guy who spent last offseason ignoring his quarterback, dissing his ass, and disappearing in the playoffs. He had a decent enough season, but he and Smith have about as much chemistry as do oil and water. Any route over 10 yards usually didn’t work.
I’m sure you guys are familiar with my misgivings about the guy. He can’t seem to understand how to read defenses. He rarely reacts to Smith being under pressure, and thus trying to get open. He for the life of him cannot run slants as he doesn’t turn his head fast enough to catch the slant. The few games I’ve seen live, and when they deign to show replays of routes, he never adjusts to Smith when protection breaks down, and he doesn’t turn for the ball if Smith breaks contain. All I hear is how wonderful he is. He’s a mean blocker. That’s all well and good, but I want my WRs to be able to catch a slant or improvise to help his QB.
I thnk the best thing to happen was for Randy Moss and Mario Manningham to come here, as it certainly knocks Crabs down off his esteemed position of being the automatic #1. He’ll fall even further if he remains on the sidelines.
Forty Niners Forever 
Listen, I’m not the biggest Maxi Pad fan myself, but let’s get one thing straight. He IS the #1 WR on this team, and will continue to be so as long as he’s healthy. He will not, I repeat NOT be remaining on the sidelines. Of the 42 REGULAR season games he’s been eligible to play, he’s started 40. I don’t know what the league avg. is for starting WRs, but I dare say it’s not above 95%. And I know you’re not the biggest fantasy football fan, your Unca’s Army prove that each and every year. But Maxi Pad is projected far and away by EVERYONE to be our biggest producer at WR. Let’s face facts: We’re gonna have to put up with a WR who’s on his period for another 16 games this year. Pass the Midol.
And oh BTW, I loved how you blamed all the miscommunication between he and Alex on Maxi Pad. It’s never Alex’s fault. Well, the fish ain’t bitin’ on that one today.
And oh BTW x2, how dare you diss that Macho Grande clip? Yes, “Airplane II: The Sequel” was nowhere near as funny as the original, but that scene was a classic. Anytime I meet someone named “Andy,” “Buddy” or “Howie” in a bar, I break out that routine. It’s always a crowd-pleaser. But you have to factor in the people I associate with. They get memorized if I show them a shiny new quarter.
Memorized? It’s mesmerized, skippy. Crabs is a chump until proven otherwise. Smith and VD have no problem hooking up deep. Crabs is wasting what talent he has.
I think we can all agree that Maxi Pad is the perfect moniker for Crabs- until proven otherwise. Lord it must be that time of month again… pass the Midol.
Yeah his talent won’t sit if he’s healthy but at the very least we can say he’s accident prone or he has weak wheels and a big ego. Can’t really blame Alex for Max’s attitude. Alex has his faults, not sayin’ otherwise but Max is being challenged maybe for the first time in his life on the field. Harbs did a good job getting him to produce last year but he does have a history of early injuries and missing camp. Thank God we have other / more options this year.
BTW Del I’m good any time on the Draft for the ESPN FF league. Fire away.
While we’re talking about pads I thought this comment by Jerry Rice would fit right in:
Jerry Rice Could Not Be More Wrong on Alex Smith and the 49ers Offense
“Rice’s full statement is as follows: “I seriously think they got to take the diaper off this guy and let him play. Let him be a grown man.”
http://bleacherreport.com/articles/1275326-jerry-rice-could-not-be-more-wrong-on-alex-smith-and-the-49ers-offense?utm_source=newsletter&utm_medium=newsletter&utm_campaign=san-francisco-49ers
We’re talk’in practice! Practice!
When he actually practices more than 1/2 a day, I might think there’s hope for the guy. As it is, fuck him. He wants out in the worst way. I’d trade his ass if he could ever get on the practice field.
Phil, Rice is not entirely wrong. They CAN go a little more free-wheeling, but they DON’T have to go overboard. The offense WAS given to Smith slowly and with small steps at first. They did fall into the same traps as before at timjes. 3 and outs, lousy drives, no ball control. There were too many punts and FGs.
But like I said, they can certainly do this is the constraints of the current system. They really need to fix the 3rd down efficiency and ball-control aspect of the offense.
I agree. We should NOT become the Packers or Pats. Keep running to throwing at around a 50-50 ratio. Just find ways to be more effective when you DO throw. Convert 38-ish to 40% on third down. Have a competent, capable passing game – you don’t have to go all fucking Mouse Davis here.
Right, given all the turmoil with the strike, new regime, etc last year the coaching was trying “not to lose” on offense with glimpses of what could be done with the then personnel. It worked with ST and D helping tremendously but the O ran out of gas right at the end. Rare ST blunders by the playa who shall not be mentioned were too much given our liabilities, 3rd down, red zone, WR.
It was kind of a gag post but I agree we don’t need to go crazy on O to be an improved team this year. Will be velly velly interesting to say the least.
Hmmm, well I figured out how to follow the blog all on my own but don’t see anywhere to join, maybe because I use a tablet not a computer or maybe I’m a little slow today.
12th man
Ooh lookie here, it knows who I am after all!
Yer fine. Welcome aboard. Things are kinda slow, unless someone gets a bug up their ass regarding Crabs or Alex.
Oh, come now, THAT would NEVER happen….
Chuckle, Grumpy. Yeah we have our moments don’t we?
Grumpy, we have been running to set up the pass, I think it should be the other way around and we should use the spread sprinkled in a little more to achieve it.
Granted that means Alex will be required to do more but if he is capable of it the offense will be productive.
I’m down with that. I’d always rather get 8 yards on first and ten, and need 2 on second; than get two on first down, and need eight on second.
To make it work, Alex has to be much better at seeing the field and making decisions. The ball needs to come out at the right time. The linemen have to do their jobs… so do the receivers and backs.
My theory about championships is that, each year, a half dozen or slightly more teams are within striking distance, with the talent and coaching to make a run. Who succeeds there is largely a matter of luck – avoiding injuries, catching opponents at the right week, and above all, getting hot in January when it counts.
Chances of that falling into place, for one of those legitimate contenders: 4-1 at best, down below 6 or 7:1 for some. Which is about the odds I’ve give us this year. Same odds the Giants start with, and only slightly better than the Packers, the Pats, the Ravens. The second tier teams – Phil, Wash, Chi, Atl, NOla, SD, Pitt, Cincy, SD… all those teams sit at 12-1 or so.
The 49ers had a 18-year run at the top of their game, from 1981 to 1998. You can drop the awful 1982 season if you like, but still, 17 years within range of the top of the mountain.
We got there 5 times in those 17 years. When we were not only very good but lucky and healthy….We succeeded about once in 3.4 seasons on average. Pretty close to that hypothetical 4:1. The other years, Montana was hurt, Dean got old, Eric Wright got hurt, we got terrible calls on penalties at bad times, we could not cover Anthony Carter or block Keith Millard, we could not keep Jim Burt out of Joe Montana’s ribcage, injuries to Hofer or Clark or or Board or Wright or Williamson gave opportunities to the opponent
that we could not stop.
The chances of winning two SBs in a row with 4:1 odds: 16:1. It’s happened, with some of the best teams of the last half century. But not anywhere near every year. Chance of the ‘Threepeat”: 64:1. A real longshot. It will happen with some team this century, but it is a very difficult thing to achieve.
The point? Be THANKFUL. We are in position to be able to make a real, no bullshit run at number six. MAYBE we get it in this season, maybe not. But it looks to me that we are on the cusp of another great era… a new generation with astute management when we live at the base camp, and are capable in any given year of making that final ascent if conditions are right. There are NO guarantees, but the franchise, for the first time in a decade, has a real potential to take it all. The next few seasons promise to be fascinating.
Nice analysis Grumpy. Thanks. Last year the D and ST were very good and we always had a chance seemed like. If we can get the O, passing game and OL working at a high level (not to mention the QB) we’ll be in the hunt.
Let’s see, it’s been 17 years + since we were in the big dance so by yer odds I’m thinking we should be due for 2 SB wins in a row. Right? : )
Training camp will provide enough arguments to go around Chuck.
Thx for the invite.
Nice job, Grump. Yeah, through the ‘great’ years, the Super Bowl rate was still relatively lacking. The thing was, the NFC back then was loaded with strong teams. Maybe not in the NFC west, but Dallas and GB were always strong. The Giants were perennial contenders. It is a hard row indeed to hoe. This is still true today.
The way the NFL is set up, a dark horse can easily come in and make a run, as the Niners did last year. It will be harder, as no one will be pencilling in a niner game as a win. I think Philly especially didn’t expect ant resistance once they got their lead on the 49ers. Now, we are concensus picks for the NFC title. No one will take the game lightly.
The Redskins as well.
Cowboys and Bears too
A team’s identity takes place on the field. Until they play for real we can only guess. We can only expect or anticipate their worth.
Wise you are master Yoda . . .
Beside Chuck’s complaints that Maxi Pad doesn’t adjust to Alex under pressure to make it easier for him to get off a pass and doesn’t look back to adjust to the ball (or actually catch slants) here’s an article with more on what Max might do to become better:
San Francisco 49ers: What Michael Crabtree Can Learn from Randy Moss
http://bleacherreport.com/articles/1276677-san-francisco-49ers-what-michael-crabtree-can-learn-from-randy-moss?utm_source=newsletter&utm_medium=newsletter&utm_campaign=san-francisco-49ers
So Maxi Pad missed his fourth straight practice today. The avg. menstruation lasts four days. If nothing else, Crabtree’s on schedule.
Yeah true but with Max the PMS is like year round…
Fine, Max has PMS but what about AJ Jenkins? Well according to Grant Cohn of the Press Democrat blog ‘Inside the 49ers’ the rookie Jenkins is a lousy stinkin’ bust because “a coach yelled at him today for running the wrong route”. Imagine that. A coach yelled at a player! Grant Cohn has taken the PD blog as heir of Maiocco and Branch and turned it into his own little whine machine. And crystal ball: Jenkins is a bust, trust me. Maiocco said to give it two years then we’ll know. But no Crystal Ball Cohn got it all figured out right after the draft and after two days of TC. His readers ripped him a new one for this latest piece of crap on Jenkins BTW.
http://49ers.pressdemocrat.com/2012/08/inside-the-49ers/a-j-jenkins-frustrates-coach-in-practice/
Shit we got another candidate for a Maxi Pad Award this season. Crystal Ball Cohn. Moron
Jesus Christ but your buddy Bullit is funny, Chuck.
One of the worst afflictions a man can have is not knowing when to shut his mouth and let it go.
Still. Free entertainment and all.
Heh heh. Between him and Berger, it’s like arguing with children.
I don’t understand… “like”?
Heh heh. Bullit talks of going to games at Kezar in the 50s. Which puts him in his 60s? He’s acting like a smitten school girl. Much like Berger and his love for Nate Schierholtz. There’s no quarter discussing these guys. Trading Pence for Nate was (according to Berger) was a tragic move for the Giants. Since Nate hit a home run yesterday, the Pence trade was a bust.
Right. The guy who averages 20 HRs and 80 RBIs a year is worse than the guy who averages 4 HRs and 17 RBIs a year.
I like Berger. He’s at least a funny guy. Bullit is like a schoolmarm preaching about the dangers of the clap. He can’t stand that anyone has a contrary opinion. I honestly think he fought with V so long he turned into what he hated.
Yeah, I did that for a while with V myself. At some point you let it go. Plus, the Insider is pretty bad now anyway, so I don’t even bother reading that. The Giants Splash blog is MUCH worse. The only sites I really deal with are this, Skeebs, and a couple Giants blogs.Yeah, Bergs at least has a sense of humor. His drunken posts? Fuck ’em. He went off yesterday on another blog about how the Giants got fleeced by the Phillies and wouldn’t stop with the Nate bullshit after Pence didn’t hit 4 HRs in his Giants debut. The repetitive over-and-over shit gets annoying as hell.
Reno’s cool. As much shiite as we’ve thrown at each other over the years, I think half of it is just for the sake of thowing shiite at each other. No problems here.
Crabs would excel as a #2. That’s been my opinion for a long time and I’m sticking to it. As for #1, meh – JJ Stokes reincarnated.
Far as the WRs go it’s still a work in progress till we have some evidence things have changed. Caution aside, we should be greatly improved with Moss, Manningham and Maxi Pad battling it out for the #1 position with VD adding to the mix. Crabs a #1? Yeah in the injury dept.
Berger slept here!
Just lay off the booze, skippy.
Hey, now, that’s crazy talk, Skippy.
Without booze we’d just be a bunch of old farts arguing on the internet instead of the Rock n Roll Supercool dudes we are. ROTFLMAO.
Bergs is awright. I don’t get into the beesball shit so we have no quarrels. Funny is good and the drunken stuff, well I’ve been there too.
Skeebutt is another story. Fuck him
Speaking of dickwads, I had a sudden total recall the other day and remembered Schwarzenegger in Terminator II (I think) saying to the little kid “I’ll be back, Dickwad”.
Yes! I knew that fine expression had a great pedigree!
Maybe Del Mar can help us out and post the exact clip? Just askin’
Jenkins a bust? Maiocco takes a rational approach:
“It’s because of Manningham that I don’t see how rookie A.J. Jenkins can make much of an impact as a rookie. Jenkins has neither been outstanding or bad. And, as expected,
he does not appear ready to challenge Manningham, Crabtree or Moss for a spot within the team’s top three.”
“Q: Why is Mario Manningham being so overlooked this off-season? Wasn’t he a sneaky good pick up? (Alex Sawyer)
Whenever I write or talk about the 49ers’ receivers, I mention Mario Manningham, along with Michael Crabtree and Randy Moss, as the team’s top three receivers.
Yes, Manningham was a very good pickup for the investment. He signed a two-year contract, and he is a starter-quality receiver. I’d expect Manningham to hold down the job as the No. 3 wideout, while also rotating into games as one of the top two guys on occasion.”
http://www.csnbayarea.com/football-san-francisco-niners/niners-talk/49ers-Mailbag-Kaepernick-slated-as-long-?blockID=750245&feedID=5936
Fucking Bullthead is a moron of epic proportions. he gets up a 6:30 in the morning to start the bullshit with Crabs up again.
Plus he’s a fucking lurker.
My favorite scene from T-1 is when Ahnuld is in some guy’s apartment, and the landlord knocks on the door. All these ‘acceptable’ replies scroll across his field of vision. He picks . . .
http://tinyurl.com/bptm4yl
Ah… “Fuck you, Asshole,” that was a goddamned classic, I remember it well.
Excellent! I’m going to have to review my Terminator education. Maybe right here…
The most emotional, at least to me, scene in the movie is when Sarah is sitting in her jeep at the gas station and looks at the Polaroid of herself. Talk about looking in the mirror and self-evaluating one’s entire life while you “fill it up.” That’s a shitload more than gas going into her tank. That hit home to me…
My college buddy and I being assholes, we always liked to ‘count down’ after the guy tells Sarah “not to worry, there are 30 cops in the building”.
30… 29… 28…. 27…
For a low budget flick, it was pretty decently done.
Yeah, they tried so hard to generate tag lines. I’ll be baack! Fuck you, asshole!