All Deebo, All Day, Forever

Like I’ve been saying since Deebo removed all the 49er shit from his profiles, word is trickling out from the webiverse that a deal is in the works for Deebo to get some fat stacks. Aaron Wilson of Pro Football Network doesn’t believe the situation is as dire as some have insinuated. Word out there is that “there is optimism surrounding a potentially huge deal for San Francisco 49ers star wide receiver Deebo Samuel, league sources told Pro Football Network,”

Thing is, Deebo is still under contract for one more season. I seriously don’t think he’s gonna sit out a season or demand a trade. And we can use the franchise tag if things don’t go as hoped. The hope is we sign him and make everyone happy. and make sure he remains a Niner for the foreseeable future.

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As the Linguini Turns

Jimmy G is apparently recovering from his shoulder surgery and will begin throwing in a week. The only team that still seems interested in the Carolina Panthers. They of the Matt Corral, Sam Darnold, and P.J. Walker triumvirate of mediocrity at the quarterback position. Corral could be the answer but he, like most rookies, would do well with a season on the bench learning the ropes.

So, Jimmy G could very well become the next Alex Smith. Placeholder and QB whisperer for the up and coming stud QB. Or even Steve DeBerg, if you think he sucks worse than Young Sir Alex. I mean, Carolina has a strong run game (if Crystal Christian McCaffrey can stay on the field, that is) a solid defense, and decent enough weapons. I guess. And Jimmy has proven he can win some games given that scenario.

Whatever happens, though, whether Jimmy is traded or cut, all this leads to the Niners getting cap space and signing Deebo Samuel. Something we are still breathlessly waiting for.

Other than that? Not much to report on in football land other than Alex Smith dealing with yet another potentially tragic situation when his 6 year old daughter Sloane had 10 hours of emergency surgery to remove a malignant brain tumor. She is apparently cancer-free and everything appears to be fine, but holy shit, what a nightmare. Dude has been through the wringer more than a few times.

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Long Live the King

Huh. Hugh McElhenny passed away a couple days ago. Hall of Famer (in 1970), 5x All-pro, 6x Pro-Bowler. He was Roger Craig waaaaay before Roger Craig, amassing 11,375 all-purpose yards. 5,281 rushing, 3,247 receiving, and 2841 on kickoff/punt returns. He was way before my time, and all I’ve seen of him is the old black-and-white footage of his runs, catches, and punt returns of 50-60 to 90 yards. One famously without his helmet. I barely remember him as being an announcer for the 49ers.

The funny story around the Niners training camp back in 1952 when they drafted him was that he took a pay cut going from the University of Washington to the 49ers. He was getting close to $10,000 a year from Washington, and his first contract with the 49ers was for $7,000 dollars. I guess the college payoff scandal isn’t as new a thing as I thought.

Other than that, not much to report, other than Alvin Kamara is awaiting his suspension for breaking a man’s eye socket in an alcohol-fueled 3:00 am Las Vegas brawl, DeShaun Watson is awaiting his suspension for the 24 women he’s accused of harassing, and Henry Ruggs is still under house arrest for his vehicular manslaughter charge.

Oh, those wacky players. . .

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Is There a Parade in the 49ers Future?

Hey, who knows? We’ve been to the dance recently, and even have another NFCCG in our bonnet. Does that mean we are ready for the next step? The Warriors pulled it off after suffering through a couple down and injured seasons. The Giants pulled off 3 in 5 with some solid pitching and a revolving cast of characters. The 49ers? We have talent in spades, one of the best pass rushers in Nick Bosa, AA, and a hopefully fucking injury-free Javon Kinlaw.

The D line should be dominant. The secondary? Well, we felt strongly enough about Hufuanga to let Tartt go. the rest of the defensive backfield is a question as we bank once again on Jason Verrett , newly acquired Charvarius Ward, and Emmanuel Moseley.
The linebacking corps is solid as ever with Warner, Greenlaw, and Al-Shaair leading the way.

Offensively we have Aiyuk, Kittle, (soon) and Deebo. A strong cast of RBs in Mitchell, Sermon (?), Hasty, Wilson, and the drafted Tyrion Davis-Price. Jennings has proven to be a stud as well catching passes. Speedster Danny Gray is a real possibility to take the lid off the defense. A real deep threat?

The O line is Trent Williams and a list of meh. Center is the big question at this point with the nominal starter at this point being undrafted rookie ASU Dohnovan West and his backup Jake Brendel. Brunskill is the 3rd stringer. What could go wrong there? West is a pretty highly rated guy so we may have gotten a steal, but this is gonna be an interesting camp as they work through the rotations on the offensive line.

And that of course leaves Trey Lance. Now that Lance has actually done some things like practice, the hot-take du jour of Lance being a bust has subsided. Only to be replaced by how shitty Steph Curry is. It’s wonderful to hear the east coast media blow smoke up the Celtics’ ass as they get their ass handed to them. But now we are hearing things like, hey, the 49ers may be among the top teams in the league.

Hey. Why not? Everyone else in the area is winning chips, it’s our turn.

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Jimmy 2B Cut, Deebo 2Not Run, Dubs Must Win

Word is “NFL execs” expect Jimmy G to be cut. Duh. Given the fact that Jimmy waited a month and a half before getting the surgery, they are less prone to giving a shit about him. Also, the 49er brass told Deebo they will not use him as a running back. Shocker there as well. Maybe John Lynch took a 2 x 4 to Kyle’s playbook. You know, the one that had Deebo facing D linemen by running him up the middle.

Let’s also hope he knocked out the parts where Trey Lance runs 18 times a game. These were my two biggest worries this offseason. How we use our best weapons.

And, the Warriors are at the stage in these finals where they are in must-win mode. Going down 3-1 isn’t advisable against a very tough Celtics team. Thing about Boston is they have a problem with consistency. They play well, they play poor the next game. It has happened to them all through the playoffs. However, they should be motivated to trying to salt this away. Dray had a shit game, as did the defense in general. Still and all, I see the Warriors bouncing back themselves.

Also, if you find yourself cheering on the Giants and Warriors tonight, raise a toast for a friend. Kevin Casey. He recently passed away, 6 months past his 60th birthday. I must have seen 50 football games with him, 100 Giants games, and a bunch of us watched football every weekend for about 14 years. From high school to our 30s. Then we started having kids, and we all did the Barney parties, the Gymboree parties, the sleepovers, and the football game watching parties got a lot more insane. Kevin was a guitar player and singer all his life, and his claim to fame was getting hired, and fired, by Ronnie Montrose to be his lead singer.

Rock on, my brother.

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Deeeeeeeebo!

Between Deebo and Jimmy, there’s little else to talk about in Ninerland. Oh, yeah. That’s right. Our new quarterback is a bust. At least that’s what the national media says. You know, the ones that proclaimed that the Niners were 100% guaranteed bet the house write it in stone to draft Jac Mones.

The 49ers seem to be some kind of bullshit magnet when it comes to media speculation around the quarterback position. Or the idea of throwing shit against the wall and seeing what sticks. Mainly because you have so many in the media in a tizzy over why Jimmy is still on the team. Like they forgot that his shoulder is mending from a surgery that for all intents and purposes could have been done in January, not March. The reasoning behind that? Not sure but it sure plays into the fact that the 49ers didn’t even bother to invite Jimmy G to the mandatory minicamp today.

Somewhat surprisingly, Deebo committed to attending the minicamp. Whatever the issues were earlier in the offseason, mainly the fact that the Niners were overusing him as a WR, a RB, AND as a PR, he balked at putting himself in harm’s way much more than needed, he seems to be in a better state of mind regarding the team.

And I still think this is the reason why the Niners drafted a RB in the 3rd round. To show Deebo that they were serious about reducing his workload. Anyway, there you have it. One step closer to signing Deebo, and one step closer to cutting Jimmy.

Side note: The last team seemingly interested in Jimmy, the Carolina Panthers, have said unequivocally that they are not interested in a trade for him. In other words, they are waiting for Jimmy to get cut.

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What is it About Our Linemen Waiting Till Forever to Announce Their Retirement?

Alex Mack announced his retirement today, a month AFTER the draft, and 2 months AFTER free agency. And 2 hours AFTER he restructured his contract to save the team $4 mill in cap space.

I’m sure they expected this to happen. There IS the possibility of throwing money at JC Tretter, or they may simply go with internal candidates; rookie Dohnovan Poe, journeyman Daniel Brunskill, or the guy who COVIDed out last year, Jake Brendel are all available and ready. Brendel received rave reviews before deciding to skip the season last year.

So, maybe this isn’t as big a deal as I thought. Or maybe it is. Just another little wrinkle in what is a seemingly needlessly fucking weird offseason. Still got Jimmy. National media is still fretting over why. Deebo still remains unsigned. Although no news is good news at this point. Don’t see an issue there.

And, Frank Gore signed a one-day contract and will officially retire as a 49er.

Much appreciation and kudos to Frank, who provided hundreds and hundreds of highlights among many seasons of fair to shitty football. Like Paul Hofer before him, he did get in some quality play with a good team, so there’s that. But the next stop for Frank is the Hall of Fame.

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As the Lance Boils

What is it about the national media and San Francisco 49ers quarterbacks? Every few days there’s a new report (substantiated by the proverbial ‘someone in the building’) that the 49ers are ‘disappointed’ in Trey Lance’s development and are dabbling with starting Jimmy G.

Colin Cowherd is the latest in a long line of talking heads that wonder why Jimmy G is still on the team (duh!!! Does shoulder surgery ring any bells?), he wonders why there isn’t any tape on Lance (it’s fucking May, and he played TWO games last year. Look at THOSE tapes), and that people are ‘selling’ Trey too hard.

Huh? Last week, the problem was NO ONE was talking about Lance. Now there is too much talk. Funny shit. He also said the Chiefs didn’t ‘sell’ Mahomes. Jesus. There’s a thing call the internet where you can look things up. There are about 250 articles on the development of Mahomes as he sat behind Alex Smith.

You know. The FUCKING PLAN ALL ALONG by the coaching staff. So, Cowherd thinks it would have been a better idea to not go the the NFCCG and force Lance to play his rookie year? Got it. Or throw a rookie QB into a playoff game? Brilliant.

Lazy fuck posting stupid shit a la Emmanuel Acho and Marcellus Wiley who both said “some guy in the building said blah blah blah. . . ” Must be fun to simply make shit up to get noticed in the interwebs. Or to drive people to your lame-ass TV show. What a fucking gig.

Whatevs. No one knows how this pans out. it may take a couple years. Josh Allen sure didn’t light the world up his first season.

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Javon Kinlaw vs Grant Cohn

Sure, I can’t stand Grant Cohn. Shit, I couldn’t stand his father Lowell Cohn. Both are shit-disturbing weasels who are only looking for reactions from the drivel the routinely and incessantly post.

In the video, Cohn said that, “if [Kinlaw] would have touched me, if he would have pushed me, I could have retired today.” Cohn said he was thinking, “‘Oh damn, I’m about to retire. I’m about to be out of the game. I’m about to be a multi-millionaire.’”

We should be so lucky.

Cohn repeatedly antagonized Kinlaw and escalated the situation to promote his fucking content. You know, the click-bait end game that is ‘journalism’ these days. Cohn said:

“Javon, what are you so upset about? Is it the fact that I said you have an 80-year-old knee…is it the fact that I said you’re unprofessional and immature? It escapes me, which of the hundred negative things I’ve said about Javon Kinlaw the last couple of years moved him to approach me in such a way.”

Teammates are all behind Kinlaw, including Arik Armstead, and George Kittle so far.

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Sweep the Mavs

Not much action on the old Warriors thread so here’s another one.

The Warriors, who have reached the playoffs 8 out of the last 10 seasons, reached the finals 5 of the last 8 season, and won the Finals 3 of the last 8 seasons are set to reach the Finals again.

No mean feat for a team that was dog meat for a good 14 seasons. Just glad the old owners got out.

Anyhow, I’m sure this game will be heavily tilted by the refs to go Dallas’ way as one more game = a lot more money for the NBA and the cities involved. But I don’t think even the refs can alter the situation.

Warriors sweep.

The Eastern Conference Finals on the other hand are pretty much a slug-fest between Miami and Boston. As John Madden famously said:

“I don’t know if I’m watching 2 great defenses or 2 terrible offenses.”

This certainly holds true for both teams. Boston has some nice players like Jaylen Brown, Jayson Tatum, and Maxwell Smart, and they are solid defensively, but meh. Same with Miami. Butler and Herro are a pretty lethal backcourt, but the rest are role players. There are no big big men left, so this should all work out to the Warriors favor.

My thought originally was if we could get through the West, we’d be a shoe-in for the whole enchilada.

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