‘Scuze Me While I Squish This Fly . . .

In more mangled lyrics (and logic), we have this. The 49ers are spending some of the mountains of cash they are sitting on to sign Vance McDonald to a 5 year, $35 million extension.

“Vance has shown consistent growth throughout his four-year career and his production this season is the result of his dedication and hard work,” 49ers general manager Trent Baalke said in a statement. “We believe he has only scratched the surface of what he will be able to accomplish in his career.”

Really? If that is the bar to cross to get an extension, then CK deserves an extension. As does Torrey Smith. Funny? Sure. But this is ludicrous. Funnier still is that there was someone who said he’d put up the numbers he has now in his illustrious 4 year career, except that he would do it in year one. I said it would take 4, but whatever. I guess we can thank that someone for being the mastermind behind the 49ers decisions these days. BakkenBuwwittBaalke anyone?!?

Other than that, I’m pretty baffled why anyone on this team short of the just hurt Joe Staley and his sore hammy would even get a passing thought at getting en extension. VMcD only drops about 25% of the passes thrown his way. Sure, that may be better than the 40% he dropped earlier in his career, but he was a ball-dropper in college. I guess Baalke has to further the career of a few of his draft picks before he himself is jettisoned. Or what? Should we extend Torrey Smith for being a mirage? Oh, that’s right. They extended Quinton Dial and Tank Carradine. You know, the guys spearheading our 32nd ranked defense.

About unca_chuck

Lifelong SF 49ers, SF Giants, and Golden State Warriors fan
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129 Responses to ‘Scuze Me While I Squish This Fly . . .

  1. Nipper says:

    The phrase, “You’re fired” is apt. for this season. Clean house with a massive blower and weed wacker.

  2. Winder says:

    Hard to understand the reasoning for that kind of money. But, if I understand things Baalky doesn’t sign checks. This is an instance that involves payroll and that would be Jed and Paarage(sp). Baalky drafts em and Jed pays em. So this is one instance that I don’t think is really on Baalky.

    • Nipper says:

      The money must be for next season and hopefully a better team. Still the Niners are so inept they may as well go with bargain basement rookies. I guess Jed is not ready to go that far. The question remains what is the team paying for?

  3. unca_chuck says:

    Well, does Baalke have input on what the money guys do? I’d think so. Otherwise they all work in separate silos dealing with player and money management?

    Who the fuck knows? I just want to make the point that this is a ridiculous thing to do at this stage of the season. No one should feel safe in their spot. Especially our pass dropping TE.

    • Nipper says:

      Chuck is getting tough! Just think Jed is fussing over his project in Los Altos Hills while the team stinks.

    • Winder says:

      chuck- Baalky does have to evaluate player progress/development and certainly has say in all player matters. I was just saying that he can’t sign-off on the money.

  4. rtfirefly says:

    I can easily come up with a dozen positions I would like to spend draft choices on or pick up a FA to fill before I even get to TE. You’ve got to have a TE and flawed as he is, McD’s numbers since he became a starter aren’t half bad – downright good in fact. As far as being overpaid, maybe, maybe not – in FA he might easily command that kind of moolah.

  5. 12th Man says:

    Chances are once all is known about this deal is its a 2 year $6/7 mil with the rest all incentive and B.S.
    More worrying to me is that Baalke made this deal showing a strong possibility he is staying. I can’t see the owner wanting to ink deals this close to a dismissal, unless Gamble is getting the nod and he agrees with it.
    Saddling a new GM with long contracts on the eve of being fired makes little sense to me.

  6. unca_chuck says:

    RTF, there are about 10 TEs that are better than himthat would be cheap FA signings.

    And 12th is right. If Baalke is making deals this late inthe game does than mean he’s still in their Good graces? I’m not happy about that.

    I mean fuck the season. Fuck nezt year. But keep Baalke? Please. Shoot me now.

    • Nipper says:

      “Baalke sucks” bags are selling off the racks at J.C. Pennys. Okay I’m day dreaming.

    • Winder says:

      chuck- I don’t see how Baalky can survive this. If Jed is gonna give the fans a big finger then he might as well just come out and say ‘Fuck You’ to all the 49er fan base. I don’t think he will do that. But, if he does it will be certainly shed a true light on his agenda. I don’t see how he can justify keeping Kelly either but from what I have been reading that is what he plans so we are probably screwed for next year too. Hopefully he will figure out that he is an idiot and get somebody in there that can make cognitive decisions.

      • 12th Man says:

        Agree on Baalke Winder, but I’m not as down on kelly as you are, at least not yet. His O has put up reasonable numbers at times with the lamest WR corp, an oft injured RB and a duo of crappy QB’s. The D on the other hand hasn’t and the scheme exposes players game after game. If I was Jed (God forbid) I would be willing to give Kelly a second year, but Baalke and O’Neil are toxic IMO.

  7. 12th Man says:

    If this report is correct it looks like Jed’s parents are taking the Baalke decision out of his hands, which is probably the only way to fire him since Jed hasn’t had the balls to do it so far and really should have last year when Tomsula was let go.

    One scenario I’ve read is that they hire the Shanny’s, Mike as GM and Kyle as HC.

    Mike’s name keeps cropping up every Niners HC go around, he was interviewed twice IIRC. I don’t like him for coach but GM maybe. Kyle is going to be a hot HC candidate this year, his O has really produced. Not sure the York collective would be interested in paying that kind of money for a 3rd coach, spending hasn’t been their MO up till now but the fans are definitely making an impact so who knows.

  8. 12th Man says:

    Rumor has it Rex Ryan out in Buffalo as soon as Monday.

  9. Berger says:

    I don’t think our talent level is as bad as most are saying. I think our coach is the #1 problem. I haven’t been as down on Baalke as most but he did hire the coach which for me is a major negative. I don’t care if they retain or fire Baalke because he has set up a potential monster off season for talent acquisition. Question is will he do anything with it. Whoever the GM is he will have a lot to work with.

  10. Nipper says:

    Is Trent still on the job after this game?

    • 12th Man says:

      Good question.

      • Nipper says:

        Yeah lots of questions but no answers. Perhaps Kap will have a big day just to muck this picture even more.

    • Nipper says:

      Can Chip find success with this team?

      • 12th Man says:

        That’s the deal, with the number of picks and available cash a good GM can make this roster viable quickly and give Kelly a fair crack at it, provided he fires his DC of course.

    • unca_chuck says:

      Bergs, you were down on Harbaugh as I was for lack of 2nd half adjustments.

      This team is dying for lack of 2nd half adjustments.

      I could give a fuck about Kelly at this point. Seeing his laugh through another pressed loss is galling but he’s not the big problem here.

  11. 12th Man says:

    Niners off to a good start, lets see if they can hold on for 3 quarters playing prevent D and O.

  12. Winder says:

    12th- We are 1-11 and the future doesn’t look to good at the moment. Chipski’s play calling isn’t fooling anyone, i have really yet seen anything that could be considered creative. And, not only does it seem like the players give up/lackadaisical/not tackling very well is a sign of poor coaching. I don’t think a second chance will make a difference. Anyway, his record is reason enough for the axe. Also, I have yet to see fire in him. I think he’s here just to collect a paycheck.

    • 12th Man says:

      I take your point Winder, but the Niners have led in 5 of those losses and the D is a sieve. Add to that Kelly has very little to work with on O and yet is putting up half decent numbers through scheme and at times the O moves the ball. I can’t figure out how much blame to pin on him. I’m not saying he is a good HC, I’m saying I’m not sure given the circumstances.
      I agree about his lack of passion, losing seem’s way too acceptable to me too. I wouldn’t be shocked to see him fired too.

    • 12th Man says:

      I did pen a reply but wordpress ate it, too lazy to do it over.

  13. Irish Kevin says:

    Well here I am in an empty stadium, at least I can sit comfortably and maybe, maybe see a win

  14. Irish Kevin says:

    Wow, Dawson misses 2 in a row!!

  15. Irish Kevin says:

    This is why the Niners can’t win, they score and then to opposing D figures them out and stops them cold!!

  16. Irish Kevin says:

    What are they saying on TV about T. smith

  17. 12th Man says:

    Niners letting the Jets hang around.

  18. 12th Man says:

    Kap started 8 of 9, now 4 of 12

  19. 12th Man says:

    Just stupid. Prevent O at its finest about to be followed by prevent D.

  20. 12th Man says:

    WTF, two wild throws from Kap and a run up the gut, 3 yards total. Playing for OT? Crazy shit.

  21. 12th Man says:

    Niners found another way to lose, this one has ramifications.

  22. Nipper says:

    Damn……another ugly loss ……is Trent still around? Jed still in charge?

  23. Nipper says:

    Is Chuck letting out a loud BLEEP somewhere?

  24. Berger says:

    Chip lost another game with his shitty 3rd quarter play calling. He is our biggest problem.

  25. Berger says:

    I liked going for it on 4th down but Chip calls the same play every time. Who doesn’t know what is coming? He is a major problem.

  26. Flavor says:

    utterly hilarious. Total joke. Embarrassment of the league. SF. That’s us.

  27. Flavor says:

    I’ve defended Chip, or at least didn’t see him as the main prob, but he had a 17-3 lead at hm vs one of the shittiest teams in the league. You HAVE to close that game out. That’s not on the players, they already took the damn lead. Chip couldn’t figure out a way to call the game all the way down to the end. This loss is squarely on him….

  28. Nipper says:

    A massive total BLEEP to the results of this season.

  29. rtfirefly says:

    Just what the doctor ordered; now we have #2 locked up. The bad news is the rumor that Cleveland’s going to do something smart for a change: draft Garrett, then trade their second first rounder for Jimmy G.

    The Chargers are our last hope. The Brownies aren’t going to win @Buf or @Pit.

    So what do we do if Garrett’s gone? With this QB class, I’m very skeptical of spending the #2 overall on one.

  30. unca_chuck says:

    WordPress is eating posts. This team is eating my soul.

  31. unca_chuck says:

    I need to watch Clemson. My son is very high on Deshaun Watson. Smart, athletic, all the tools.

    The O line is actually not terrible. The run game? Meh. But QB play has been terrible of late and the lack of WRs doesn’t help.

    I have no fucking read on the defense. They are good at times and the. They look like idiots for long stretches. I’d like to think we have talent on D but I don’t really know. Draft a fucking QB unless the Skidmarks take Watson.

  32. unca_chuck says:

    I’m at the point we have to start trying at least to get a fuckng QB. We ain’t gonna find Dak in the later rounds.

  33. unca_chuck says:

    Does every team play 4 games in 5 days like the Warriors just did?

  34. ewisco says:

    not to beat a dead horse, but why wouldn’t you try ponder at this point?

    The NBA schedule is a joke, MLB isn’t far from it. go back to 152 (154?) games.

    • Flavor says:

      absolutely to both of your points. I don’t think for a second that Ponder will be anything useful. But I am sick to near death watching Kaep play QB for the NIners. Talk about *time to move on/it’s not you it’s me/etc…” Just end this already. And Ponder QBing out the season might at least be entertaining. I fucking hate Kaep. How many games in a row has he lost? 14? How about you stop protesting for 2 seconds and go win a damn game…..

    • 12th Man says:

      Absolutely try Ponder, no coach will do well when his QB goes 6-18 in the second half, 33% completion is atrocious, Not to say Kelly is blameless, he isn’t.

      • Berger says:

        Chip did not put Kap in good situations to make things happen but he still needs to play better. The three and outs in the 3rd quarter gassed the defense. You could see them playing too upright in the 4th and the RBs just ducking under the tackles.

      • 12th Man says:

        I checked Kap’s stats for the second half, it was 4 of 17. No coach can scheme for that. I did think Kelly went very conservative calling it prevent O at the time but Kap missing on more than 75% of his throws can’t be accounted for in play calling.

        I’m not apologizing for Kelly. 1-12 speaks for itself as does the consistent second half malaise and if he gets fired too I won’t shed any tears but I don’t think he has much of a shot with that kind of performance from his players. He can draw up the best plays but if his players can’t tie their shoelaces it makes it worthless.

        Carlos showed some heart though, hitting the tackles hard.

  35. unca_chuck says:

    It’s more than Kap. He’s got an inept corps of pass catchers that drop passes and a coach that isn’t helping things by becoming supremely unimaginative every motherfucking 3rd quarter. I hated Harbaugh for playing from ahead a lot, and Chipper is even more ridiculous at it. This team has blown leads in almost all of their games.

    Then again, Phil Dawson hadn’t lost us any games, so today it was his turn.

    But at this point it doesn’t really matter. Ponder, Kappy, or Blaine the insane membrane train will all lose. The Niners ain’t as bad as their record, but they are close. . .

    • ewisco says:

      it sort of doesn’t matter as opposed to “really” does’t matter. nothing in the big picture is going to change but why wouldn’t you start ponder? you really need to know what you have there. he’s an early round draft pick which means he has talent. he’s admitted to confidence issues when he first started. maybe he’s solved that. it happens. not often but hey, what do we have to lose?

  36. unca_chuck says:

    Hey, Flav, if neither AZ or the Niners reach 8-8 does that mean the bet is off?

    Hah! Don’t worry. You’ll get your bottle of Ripple.

  37. unca_chuck says:

    Tell ya one thing, I’m still laughing like hell that the Rams gave Jeff Fisher an extension. He’s about to (next week) set the record for most losses as a head coach. Never has one man done less with more.

    42-14? Jeeebus…….

  38. unca_chuck says:

    If we have a good GM in place, it’s a start to getting coaching talent.

  39. unca_chuck says:

    Is that Tom Gamble? Don’t know, but that’s who it will be.

  40. 12th Man says:

    in last 17 games:
    vs. Rams: 2-0
    vs. rest of NFL: 0-15

    • rob says:

      Not so sure Chip is the problem. Our biggest weaknesses are clearly lack of a no. 1 WR and maybe DC

      • rob says:

        Patton and Kerley were our two starters at WR last game. That has to be the least effective dou in the league.

      • 12th Man says:

        Need a QB and pass rusher before a WR IMO and definitely a pro DC.
        I can’t say how much is Kelly, too much shit to wade through to know.

  41. rob says:

    look on the bright side we have a top pick and an obscene amount of cap room for next season.

  42. Nipper says:

    Time for action…….bring in new football people to run this badly run organization. Jed better do something soon or else events will overtake him.

  43. rob says:

    This might be the way to go. Bring in Shanny and let him do the rest.

    • rob says:

      I really think we can get a WR and pass rusher this draft. Maybe WR with our top 3 pick and use our multiple picks to go from the top of two back into one for a pass rusher. Baalke did this last year and got us a starter on both lines.

  44. rtfirefly says:



  45. unca_chuck says:

    Wow, that’s even more ridiculous. Extend the guy, and THEN can him 3 weeks later? Another clown show in LA.

    ROB!!! We had a top pick and a boatload of cap space LAST season.

  46. Irish Kevin says:

    The title of your next thread should be “How Low can you go??”

    I didn’t think the Niners could go any lower, BOY DID THEY PROVE ME WRONG!!

  47. 12th Man says:

    Newly inked 270 lb tight end Vance McDonald was placed on IR today.
    I swear this team has bad mojo right now.

    • Nipper says:

      Jed is probably in an underground bunker beneath his cabana. Anyone see the guy? Of course not! He will not show his face again. His mother will fly out and take over the whole mess. GO TEAM!

  48. Berger says:

    You can have good players and lose. Chip came in the league and did well but has not adjusted while the league adjusted to him. His 3rd quarters are a microcosm of this.

    I’ll guarantee Billacheat would have this roster at .500 or better and Kap would not be on the team. Billacheat deals with distractions by getting rid of them, just like Walsh did. York, Baalke, Chip supported the distraction. Losers lose. Doesn’t matter what side you are on, politics and football do not mix. It was the same reason I never wanted Tebow, too much of a distraction.

    We need some football people who don’t get distracted and know how to mold a team instead of just picking players. I don’t know how I feel about the Shanahan rumors but it can’t be worse than what we currently have.

  49. Nipper says:

    Losing to the pathetic Jets was the final straw. A terrible result will force the Yorks into some type of action as their reputations are falling apart. The terrible Rams have already begun the process of booting these unproductive men out of the league.

  50. unca_chuck says:

    I have no love lost for Mike Shanahan, but he’s a far better sight as the head of football operations than Young Sir Jed Sucks-a-lot.

  51. rtfirefly says:

    Florio contradicted the whole “Jed out” report by Jason. Jason tweeted later than he didn’t mention any GMs or HCs (no Shanny). Jason’s not too reputable for accurate rumors. Florio reported the Harbaugh ouster first.

    I think it’s all just a Santa’s list dream. Wait and see what really happens. Like asking for a 1952 Triumph roadster and getting new socks and underwear.

    • rtfirefly says:

      Although come to think of it, at least new socks and underwear are functional. Not sure everyone staying or at best Gamble for Baalke qualifies.

  52. rtfirefly says:

    What we ask Santa for

    What we’ll get from the Yorks

  53. rtfirefly says:

    Our across the street neighbor tried to sell me one of his old junkers when I was a kid. A TR-2. Man, I still regret not buying it, even if it meant having to learn how to service it constantly. Only car I ever drove with a choke – I don’t even remember how you have to use the damn thing.

  54. Nipper says:

    Any Jed sightings? How about Trent? Rumors keep flying around the Niners.

  55. rob says:

    Since we now know we can’t count on Ian Williams health and see our run defense struggling as a result. I propose with the 2nd pick in Rd. three Jameel Johnson NT Iowa

  56. unca_chuck says:

    My old land cruiser bobtail had a choke.

    • Nipper says:

      My first Opel Kadett had a choke. Damn that little car always performed for me. I just got my GMC truck to pass smog. It only took me four tests and 11 months! Ouch.

  57. Nipper says:

    All I know it’s December 13th and Baalke still sucks and Jed should go. Fans are so mad they’re wearing boxes and not bags anymore.

  58. 12th Man says:

    McDonalds actual guaranteed portion of his contract: 1 year 9.1 million. If he is retained for 2018 it becomes 2 years at 12.8 million. Pretty much what I figured except they gave him 9.1 for 1 years play which is a lot up front.

    Anything beyond 1 year is at the teams pleasure. Can’t say I’m a fan of these deals. They did the same to Kap, his deal was actually 1 year and at the teams pleasure beyond that causing instability and friction with the player once he figured it out. It does give maximum flexibility to the team but very little security, beyond the initial guaranteed money, to the player.

    I don’t see why players would fully invest for the long term if the team doesn’t do the same. The majority of contracts around the league are 2 or 3 year guaranteed deals and if you cut the player you have to pay him so he has some measure of financial security.

    Too greedy by the team IMO, other than having to give away a bit too much in the front end to get him to sign his 1 year contract.

  59. 12th Man says:

    Cosell on Kap. He basically says the play design is good, the passer isn’t. Which has been my point for a while. Kelly did go too conservative no doubt, but when Kap had decent plays called he choked.

    • 12th Man says:

      Forgot to add the juicy bit. Cosell says Kap is not really an NFL QB and not part of the solution for next year. I agree and it makes this a waste of time to keep playing him or Gabbert. They really need to put Ponder in to see what the have.
      Hot tub Matt Barkley has risen from the ashes, why not Ponder?

      • Nipper says:

        Playing Ponder is like admitting one is not finding the answers and admitting the coach doesn’t know what to do. It’s play Kap or bust with the Chipper. Looks like the Chipper will go bust in the end. Kap is a coach killer.

      • 12th Man says:

        I think it’s admitting the 2 QB’s on the active roster are not the answer. It is a risk because if Ponder falls flat there is no fall back position but Chip did exactly that in Chicago putting Gabbert back in.
        I don’t see what’s to lose and if Ponder does well it looks good for the Chipster.

  60. 12th Man says:

    For what it’s worth (not much) Canfora doubled down on his opinion that big changes are coming at the end of the year and adds that the organization is looking outside for the new GM, not at Gamble, although he didn’t rule that out.

  61. 12th Man says:

    Amazing, Kilgore to IR. That makes 12 players on IR this year. It also means Marcus Martin is back in the starting line up, oh boy.

  62. 12th Man says:

    Ted Robinson agrees big changes are necessary and knows they are being considered and were last year too. Canfora is one thing, but Robinson is a company broadcaster who travels and is connected with the team so I put more credence into what he is saying:

  63. unca_chuck says:

    Depth was a big concern going in to the season. Thanks to Trent. Here we are injured and outmanned.

    Cosell can blow me. Everything was a mirage in 2012 and 2013. Look, Kappy ain’t the answer, but the question is ‘Why haven’t we drafted his replacement over the past 3 drafts?’ Why haven’t we given our shitty QBs any WRs to throw to? Why did we let Boldin go and do nothing about it? And Crabs? And VD? Fucking Delanie Walker is still playing well and we just re-upped Roberto Duran.

  64. unca_chuck says:

    In other words, a great QB gets what, 5 wins out of this team? There is a league full of middling QBs that we have to choose from next year.

    You prefer Romo? Well, who’s his backup as he will be crippled by week 3. Fitzpatrick? Shaun Hill?

    • 12th Man says:

      We won’t know until the time comes which QB’s will be available or could be traded for or drafted. The notion that Kap is the best of what’s available isn’t true, Kap is not an NFL caliber QB now, he did well when the team was maybe the most talented in the league but as a QB, not athlete runner, he sucks balls.
      The only thing I know for sure is Gabbert is not better than Kap and that its only by degree since both are rated in the cellar.

      Niners played against backups in Chicago and against the Jets and both QB’s outplayed Kap.

  65. unca_chuck says:

    Kappy doesn’t play defense though. They all suck. I just don’t see too many options. Cutler? Romo? Fitzpatrick? No no and fuck no. There are 10 other no’s out there. We’d be best off with Deshaun Watson at this point. Build a new team around a new guy. Cleveland cannot draft yet another QB so they’ll take Myles Garrett.

    New thread is up.

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