A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Slaughterhouse

Strange Days, Indeed. Say what you will about our kneeling non-voter who loves him some Fidel, Colin Kaepernick actually looks like he’s catching on to Chip Kelly’s offense. After a couple shitty games where CK was shaking off the rust of his benching and injury layoff, he’s gone 86-145 for 1100 yards (60%), 8 TDs, and 2 picks. Even with the 2 shitty games, his numbers are improving, and yesterday’s game saw Kap rush for 113 yards as well.

Frankly, they are in a spot where there ain’t any definitive QBs coming out for the draft in 2017. And the free agent market looks like Walmart after Black Friday. Cutler? Fuck that. Ryan Fitzpatrick Fitzryan? Uh, no. Romo? God no to the Nth degree. Trading up in the draft is a non-starter as there is no one that solid coming out. Mortgaging the future for Goff will be the death of the Rams. And they were the blueprint for NOT doing it by seeing what happened to the Redskins and RG III and out. Not that they had any life anyway, but they will continue to circle the drain. The Cards look to be falling back to Earth in a big way. Seattle is pretty fucking wobbly as well.

Believe it or not, keeping Kappy is the best option out there till this team actually has a couple successful drafts. Kappy did well yesterday with nothing in the WR OR TE corps and a defense that gives up 3rd down conversions like a creepy clown handing out candy to little kids.

Beyond that, if this team seriously gets Tony Romo, we will be the laughingstock of the NFL.


About unca_chuck

Lifelong SF 49ers, SF Giants, and Golden State Warriors fan
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47 Responses to A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Slaughterhouse

  1. unca_chuck says:

    As usual, the k-k-klowns on skeebers blog blame the loss on Colin Kaepernick. Jesus. Are they that racist that they have to ascribe everything to him? 50% 1st down success rate by Miami? Big play after big play? Did Gabbert catch any heat? No. He’s white, therefore, he’s beyond reproach.

    He might as well call his blog Breitbart Jr.

  2. unca_chuck says:

    Regardless of the non-existent pass rush. They have 3/5 of their O line hurt, and we get 2 sacks. Yeah, It was Kappy’s fault.

    NE has no pass rush to speak of and we give up 5.

    • 12th Man says:

      A big part of the reason the Niners are giving up sacks is because the opposing D doesn’t have to defend much beyond 15 yds or so, which free’s up the ability to stunt and blitz at the LOS. Kap’s numbers plummet when under pressure.
      That is largely why teams without a pass rush reputation are getting home against the Niners. The Niners are almost all short game without the QB being quick enough or accurate enough to lead WR’s so RAC comes into play. Shot plays are rare and generally inaccurate when they do try.
      I think the O line is doing OK. Brown had some mistakes yesterday but Suh and Wake are experienced quality players taking Brown to school, he is learning. Staley had his hands full too and gave up a couple of penalties, but the Fins D line is top notch and they get paid too.

  3. 12th Man says:

    It was another competitive game with a lull period on O and another decent game against the run which cost them some coverage in the backfield. I picked the Niners to win against AZ and Miami by three and they lost by one score in games I think they had a chance to win, just not good enough on the D side both coaching and players, to pull it off.

    Kap is improving but the same fundamental flaws are there to see. Too many dropped passes isn’t helping for sure and the Celek fumble was too much to overcome creating a 10/14 point swing since they were already in FG range.

    They were down 31-14 and fought back/were allowed easy prevent defense, but however you choose to look at it they were a couple of yards away from a tie, east coast, against a team on a 5 win streak. It says something about the players anyway.

    • Nipper says:

      A moral victory as they say?

      • 12th Man says:

        No victory of any kind but the O players showed heart, which considering their record means something, including that they are still with Kelly. Can’t say the same for O’Neil, where his squad just keep folding and make basic mistakes.
        Kap had 130 yds through the air going into the 4th qtr when the Fins went prevent. Although he is improving, I feel like we are looking at fools gold where any sign of decent play is amplified beyond what it is, grading on a curve. Sad to say he was the best Niners player on Sunday, warts and all.

        Niners didn’t lose because of Kap but didn’t win because of him either.

    • Winder says:

      Well said 12th. Stats can be very misleading. Whether Miami’s D over looked us or not we didn’t perform when we needed to most. I really can’t say much about this game because all I did was watch highlights and read about it. So my input doesn’t mean much.

      • 12th Man says:

        Thx Winder. The highlights miss out the doldrum periods when the O can’t get going at all. Teams don’t score every possession, but good teams do enough each turn to hold field position and rest their D players. This team trips over its own feet or snoozes for long periods on O and the D isn’t close to cohesive enough of a unit to keep the Niners in the game until the O wakes up again, if it does, plenty of blow outs this year too.

        I don’t have a handle on if Kelly can do the job well enough. The roster is so thin and injured and devoid of stand out players he really doesn’t have much to work with.

  4. unca_chuck says:

    The point being, Kaepernick didn’t make mistakes or go into a 3-series funk like previous games. He’s still behind on a lot of throws, but he did hit some downfield. McDonald always seems to have a drop of an easy 35!yard gain and yesterday was no exceptinn

  5. 12th Man says:

    Drops play their part no argument and the Niners are 3% above average there, but when games are in contention this O, and Kap, go to sleep every time when it really counts and they need a score. Rallies in the 4th qtr are all good and well but stats get padded that way, soft D. Gabbert had OK stats, he just wasn’t any good when the game mattered and Kap is only a little better so far IMO.
    Kap is ranked 6th from last in deep ball passing, defined as 21-30 yards, despite having the second most attempts, that is from PFF and that is not all drops.
    Throwing deep does make the D have to respect it, but over time, throwing deep badly with a high percentage of misses means single coverage deep and it has little to no effect which is where Kap is now.
    Fundamentely he still has the same flaws. I give him kudos for improving in a bad situation and trying but this team without many (any?) O stars needs a consistent QB. Flashy plays here and there won’t get it done.

    I still don’t understand why Kelly hasn’t promoted Ponder to second string to see what they have. If the season continues to tank, Ponder would be ready to play and get a real evaluation. Kelly said himself today that there is no real way to evaluate a QB without playing in real games and I agree with that. Gabbert has been weighed and measured and found wanting, they know exactly what he can and can’t do.

    Ponder is unknown but he did find WR’s in pre-season when the other guys didn’t, yeah its PS but the same WR’s played.

    I don’t know which rookie QB would come in and do better than Kap, but Prescott was 4th round IIRC and yes he has a better cast around him but he also has all the tools, so it can be done.

    Derek Carr is another example of a rookie who did well despite being on a shitty team except for a few skill players and that’s what it takes to build a team, solid line play, and a consistent QB are the first key ingredients.

    Problem is I have no faith in Baalke selecting skill players, his track record stinks in that category and Kelly the GM stunk in Philly. For that reason alone Baalke needs a pink slip, how are they going to turn it around without skill position talent?

    Baalke way overpaid for a one trick pony WR Torrey Smith who’s only attribute is as a burner, problem is Kap can’t deliver the long throw so what’s the point?

    Kap is fools gold.

  6. unca_chuck says:

    Based in the current situation, would you rather have Ponder starting? Gabbert? Or next year, Cutler? Fitzpatrick? Romo?

    In the draft we have a whole lot of question marks.

    Kizer has the size and tools, but he’s inexperienced and green. He’s a project. I wouldn’t go there in the 1st round.
    Trubisky? Another guy who looks right but has faced limited action. Another project. I hadn’t heard of him much at all. Nope. Not in the 1st.
    Watson? He looks like the best of the group. I think so. As does my son. He’s better at this than me anyway. Take him in the 1st? Risky as hell, but if they go QB, this is the pick.
    There are others, Like Davis Webb from Cal (no time under center), solid 2nd rounder.
    Pat Mahomes would be my sleeper in the 2nd round. Another guy who has little under-center time, but he’s god good vision.

    Hate to say it but we need a pass rusher in the 1st round. If anything is readily apparent, we have no pass rush and it is killing us. Things seems to be evening out a little in run D. Get a pass rusher.

    Next year maybe there will be some QBs that stand out.

    • Nipper says:

      Emphasis on “maybe.”

    • 12th Man says:

      I’m no draft guru Chuck but almost every year some GM’s come up with QB’s that play well. I think what I’m saying about Kap is we already know the best he can be with a tremendous supporting cast, which will take several years and likely a different GM to get back to. Since with this team Kap can’t approach that level of play, in effect we are just marking time, throwing away a season where another player can take a shot.

      I’m not saying Ponder is better than Kap, I’m saying we don’t know. I say elevate him to back up now so he gets some reps with the ones and if the team is still losing in a couple of weeks put him in to see what he is capable of since all QB’s on roster are either not signed for next year or have the ability to walk.

      I also don’t say QB in the first round necessarily and agree they need a pass rusher but also an ILB, a CB, a NT, a QB, a WR, a TE and a RB.

      Thats 8 holes to fill by draft or FA but Baalke’s track record shows 3 of those positions he will ignore or isn’t capable of drafting and he will do next to nothing in free agency because he believes in building through the draft only. Thing is it can be done with FA too. The Raiders have 4 FA starters on their O line, so why exclude FA, ideology? Stupid.

      Baalke is not doing a good job of managing this roster and confidence in him suddenly changing his philosophy and trying new things is unfounded which is what NJ ascribes to, saying Baalke and Kelly should put their heads together in the draft. For what? Both Baalke and Kelly have stunk as draftnicks.

      If Jed doesn’t get rid of Baalke his claim to family heritage with Eddie D is bogus because Eddie would fire Baalke in a NY minute and we all know it.

  7. rtfirefly says:

    It won’t be Kirk Cousins. Skins say they’ll franchise him if necessary. As for drops, did you see the Bears highlights yesterday? LOL, it was like The Keystone Kops. 8 drops right in the hands, in the breadbasket, on the money. 3 dropped TD passes, right in the hands, and I mean not a tough catch in the bunch. It’s worth watching for a laugh (because it’s not us).

  8. Winder says:

    I really don’t care what round we draft a QB in but I hope we take a couple of em next draft. Our D does need pass rushing skills but we have spent 2 1st rounders on them the last few years. I still like the Buckner pick and in my mind it was a no brainer I would have done the same. The only problem is I don’t think he fits our scheme. Not his fault, it’s ours. We need skill players i say draft them and pick up FA for the lines. That is unless someone amazing falls into our laps. I don’t trust Baalky with any of it.

  9. NJ49er says:

    12th the opinion I have is practiced in most every FO in this League.
    HC and GM working together to construct a roster.
    When the Owner is constantly canning HCs what’s the result?
    New Coaches, pieces that don’t necessarily fit, starting over from square one.

    It begins and ends with a QB, especially for the Chip Kelly System.
    Chip tried on more than a few QB options while in Philly, with lukewarm results.
    His System requires a quick trigger, quick thinker, and accurate delivery.
    Kaep checks none of those boxes.

    I’ll agree with the suggestion Greg Cosell made with Maiocco recently.
    See what the price tag is for Jimmy Garappolo in NE.
    For me, looking ahead at the Draft Class, I’d pass on a QB until later RDs.
    Go Defensive option RD1, take a shot at WR Corey Davis, (if he makes it) in RD2.
    Look for ILB/DT/RB etc from RD3-5.
    I like what I’ve seen of WMU QB Zach Terrell. He might be around beyond RD5?

  10. unca_chuck says:

    12th, we’ve needed an ILB for the last 2 drafts, and Baalke ignored that. QB and WR as well.

    I don’t get his style and I don’t get the results.

    • NJ49er says:

      Borland, Skov, Ray-Ray, Hodges?
      Losing Patrick and Bowman isn’t an easy fix.
      It’s not all about the Draft with the roster either.
      They’ve got a ton of Cap surplus to work with now also.

      Only guy I’d consider as 1st RD-worthy right now is Reuben Foster from ‘Bama.
      He’s likely not worthy of a Pick in the Top 5 but, that’s how this process works.
      How do you separate the talent Grades between the positions vs the needs of the roster?

  11. NJ49er says:

    The guy they just added, DT Chris Jones looked reasonably productive vs Miami yesterday too.
    We’re missing too many tackles, getting out of position too often etc.
    Lots of things to point at with yet another system overhaul in SF.
    Never expected this much confusion TBH.

  12. Nipper says:

    Anyone get fired?

    • Nipper says:

      The way the Niners are tackling some coach should lose his job over that . Who’s teaching these guys to tackle?

  13. Nipper says:

    Jed should resign if he refuses to take some action soon. He’s a disaster along with his pathetic GM. Send the Chipper back to college where he belongs. This is the NFL where production is required. Damn the mistakes keep mounting.

  14. unca_chuck says:

    NJ, you need both effective drafts and cogent free agent signings. Neither of which Baalke has done. He’s gone strictly BPA and ignored glaring needs for 3 years now. It has netted little. Yeah, it’s a crapshoot, but I could have done better and I’m basically an idiot. And I’m dead serious about that. You would have drafted circles around him.

    I get not spending wildly in free agency, but ignoring issues draft after draft is insane when you follow it up with not filling the draft gaps with not signing free agents.

    The coaching turnover is a new-ish thing. Last year believe it or not was one littered with injuries. Jed did the wrong thing and stuck with Baalke. Now we have another ineffectual coaching staff and a team with no depth and diminishing talent.

  15. Nipper says:

    Damn what’s wrong? Where’s all the grumpy men ready to grouse about a lost season. Perhaps they’ve move on to the “other” blog.

  16. 12th Man says:

    I don’t know what it is with the ILB position for the Niners, I think it’s cursed. Skov to IR:

  17. unca_chuck says:

    Super70sSports has some funny shit.

  18. unca_chuck says:

    Kelvin Taylor cut by Trent. Another one bites the dust.

  19. unca_chuck says:

    The diff between me and BakkenBuwwit? I wear a bag on my head at games. He wears a white hood.

  20. unca_chuck says:

    And we have this beauty. We knew him. We sorta liked him . . .

  21. Nipper says:

    Chip should go back to Oregon but he won’t unless Jed has the nerve to fire him. Jed doesn’t have nerve to be seen in public let alone to make a simple decision.

  22. unca_chuck says:

    Funny how this is working out. If hiding out is Jed’s response to destroying this team, then maybe he will sell fairly quickly.

    Meaning a couple more dogshit years and maybe the Yorks bail. Which, in the grand scheme of things is fine with me.

  23. 12th Man says:

    If Jed is seen or makes comments he is a meddler, if he waits till the end of the season and leaves it to “the football guys” he is hiding, what a crock.

    NJ, didn’t have a chance to respond before. Nobody is saying the model of a GM and HC working together is a bad one. We are saying this GM has by any reasonable measure failed at being a GM and its time to try somebody else. As for Kelly helping make the picks he didn’t do well in that role either.

    Giving Baalke another year makes no sense to me, I read he has had 78 picks and 3 pro bowl quality guys to show for it and 1 of those was an alternate, its just not good enough.

  24. unca_chuck says:

    BINGO!!!!! Winner winner chicken dinner. Didn’t see this before I wrote a new thread but it is similar to this.

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