Why Your Team Sucks

Hey, it’s slow, and the Dallas game ain’t for a couple days, but a friend of mine gave me this link from Deadspin. This guy does one of these for every team.


Given the ammo, there’s a lot to cover . . .


About unca_chuck

Lifelong SF 49ers, SF Giants, and Golden State Warriors fan
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98 Responses to Why Your Team Sucks

  1. unca_chuck says:

    Check the comments of the Chiefs one . . .


    “There have been more deaths in the stadium parking lot than playoff wins in the past 21 years.”


    From the Chiefs comments. One of my highlights of last year. Dee Ford wanting no part of Frank Gore.

  2. unca_chuck says:

    More time management talk from the Revisionist Commies. Buwwit is like a Chihuahua with a little chicken bone. Timeouts and delay of game penalties haven;t been a problem! But it is Kappy’s fault! Pretzel logic indeed.

    Funny I don’t remember the defense being called for delay of game penalties, or having to burn timeouts inordinately.

    • 12th Man says:

      Turns out Denial actually is a river in Egypt.

      Trying to create the case that the O was not deliberately slow to break the huddle based on coaching criteria is desperation to be “right” personified.

      Somehow these bloggers are able to divine something the entire football press, the various coaching staffs, and the players themselves, as well as any sane sentient being on the planet watching it unfold can’t.

      They manage to pull off said feat by utilizing the all-22 tape and singular anecdotal evidence of Kap being set up by the defense, it was able to set him up because they knew, as did every other defense, exactly the labored procedures and instructions the QB was told to operate under and I know that for a fact because the QB’s and opposing Defenses have stated it on the record.

      Howl away at the moon bloggers.

  3. Berger says:

    unca- Check your spam. It zapped another from the last thread. I’m going to transfer it to this thread as soon as you get it up.

  4. Berger says:

    The dumbass North Korean is showing his lack of football acumen again. Kawakami reported that 4 different coaches were actually calling the plays last year on offense. Mangini uses 6 coaches to help him make the calls, which is very normal for any OC or DC. Bullit(sic) is trying to use North Korean propaganda tactics to have us think those are both the same thing. Mangini is the only coach actually calling the plays for the defense. He uses others to help him gather the info to make the decisions. I’d say that is smart.

  5. Berger says:

    It went to spam again as I tried to transfer it here. If I knew why it was going to spam I wouldn’t do whatever that is.

  6. 12th Man says:

    Bergers post:
    The dumbass North Korean is showing his lack of football acumen again. Kawakami reported that 4 different coaches were actually calling the plays last year on offense. Mangini uses 6 coaches to help him make the calls, which is very normal for any OC or DC. He is trying to use North Korean propaganda tactics to have us think those are both the same thing. Mangini is the only coach actually calling the plays for the defense. He uses others to help him gather the info to make the decisions. I’d say that is smart.

  7. 12th Man says:

    I tried to copy it here for you Berger, it went to spam.

  8. 12th Man says:

    And now it showed up.

  9. unca_chuck says:

    I changed a couple things, but I’m not really sure what the problem is . . .

    I’ll test it

    The dumbass North Korean is showing his lack of football acumen again. Kawakami reported that 4 different coaches were actually calling the plays last year on offense. Mangini uses 6 coaches to help him make the calls, which is very normal for any OC or DC. He is trying to use North Korean propaganda tactics to have us think those are both the same thing. Mangini is the only coach actually calling the plays for the defense. He uses others to help him gather the info to make the decisions. I’d say that is smart.

  10. unca_chuck says:

    Hmmm. There were a couple random words included in a couple of the 750 email addies that V has created and I’ve banned over the years,

  11. Winder says:

    chuck- thanks for the deadspin link, good stuff.

  12. Berger says:

    I’m going to try some phrases to see what got caught in spam.

    That dumb ass North Korean, Bullit (sic).

  13. Berger says:

    Bullit (sic) and his North Korean propaganda tactics.

  14. Berger says:

    Football acumen

  15. Berger says:

    Chuck- I found the word that is getting spammed. It is akumen with a ‘c’. Even your computer has a hard time putting football akumen and Bullit (sic) in the same sentence!

  16. unca_chuck says:

    That was ODB, aka V commenting about a certain bodily fluid over and over.

  17. unca_chuck says:

    Interesting (if not long as hell) article from ESPN the mag about Chris Borland.


    Also funny that out of all the issues brought up in the article, what Bullit focuses on. It isn’t that inherent danger of the game, the tough decisions that Borland made, the hype/greed machine around the NFL and football in general, or anything related to player safety, it’s the 2 sentences around the front office. Typical.

  18. Berger says:

    I just went to the spam filter again.

  19. Berger says:

    Now the cancer site blogites are trying to say the delay of game penalties were not a big deal when they were the ones complaining about it the most last season. Obviously they know they are not right about this issue. As usual, they cite numbers. They do this because they do not have the capacity to think things through. IOW, if the numbers don’t add up they can’t see it.

    As I see it, snapping the ball with one or two seconds on the play clock allows the other team to know you are snapping the ball on one. Any strategist would know this is a major tactical advantage you give away to the defense. Or how about the blown time outs used so we did not get a delay of game. Seems we lost a TD on our final drive of the Super Bowl when Harbaugh had to run down the sideline and call a timeout because the play clock was about to run out. Even if we don’t score, if we had that timeout back we would have had some time left on the clock after the safety. An article I read a couple of days ago said we would have had about 34 seconds and the ball around mid field.

  20. unca_chuck says:

    Well, that word with a banned work in it shouldn’t be used. Acumen?

  21. Berger says:

    Looks like we traded Derrick Carrier to Washington for a 5th round pick. I liked Carrier as a pass catcher. I kept reading he wasn’t a god blocker. Now we have only 6 TEs.

  22. unca_chuck says:

    Yeah, Carrier was OK, but Bell can fill his role easily. We got zip out of the TE position last year. Let’s hope they get some shit to work with them this year.

    I liked the drag plays we used in game 1.

  23. rtfirefly says:

    I tried to watch some of the Falcons @ the Jets tonight. Honestly. I tried.

  24. rtfirefly says:

    For the Chiefs, Alex has a TD pass against the Hawks. And one for the Hawks.

  25. rob says:


  26. Nipper says:

    How about Geneoushire sucks? Sir Spit is a cross dresser.

  27. rtfirefly says:

    Seahawks drop another one! If only it meant something. If only…

  28. rob says:


  29. rob says:


  30. Berger says:

    Rob is on a roll!

  31. rtfirefly says:

    The good news is that without Faulk playing, the Seahawks couldn’t do squat on offense (Alex gave them their only TD) and their blocking was bad. Here’s hoping trading multiple Pro Bowler Unger for Graham bites them in the ass.

    • Berger says:

      That is the first thing I thought of when they obtained Graham. Unger was anchoring an average line. That could be a huge loss for them. I hope so.

      • rtfirefly says:

        I always think centers are underrated. I think the loss of Kilgore last year was huge, though the right side of that line was so putrid I don’t think anything would’ve helped.

      • Berger says:

        We also had the most discombobulated play calling I had ever seen. The line was bad but not as bad as it looked.

      • Berger says:

        I had never heard a players calling out the schemes before. Staley calling out the “dumb schemes” and Crabtree saying we were “out schemed after a game. The GMs daughter tweets we don’t need the OC anymore. I never saw a coaching staff thrown under the bus by players like last year.

      • rtfirefly says:

        As you know, I didn’t like Roman. If that was a condition for keeping Harbs, I would’ve bit my tongue and accepted it, though. I would have tried to convince Harbs to change OCs or force Roman to upgrade the offense. I believe they were trying to do just that, but the line just disappeared one wounded body at a time, so the offensive change backfired.

      • Berger says:

        Although I think it was both, IMO it was Harbaugh more than Roman. I always wanted to get rid of Roman to find out who by process of elimination. I was originally just wanting to get rid of Roman but the more info that is getting out I am glad they got rid of both. Harbaugh was getting way too full of himself. I’m actually rooting for Roman to do well in Buffalo.

  32. unca_chuck says:

    Keyboard tourette’s, ROB???

    My thought on Graham was Seattle got a guy who doesn’t want to block. Carroll is not big on TE routes either. I think they may be leaking oil as the season comes to a close.

  33. unca_chuck says:

    What;s funny is Spitty is going to stop following the team 10 times a day every day all season long.

    Like I said, I almost feel bad for Skeeves.

  34. 12th Man says:

    Spitty and V, nothing but attention whores, Basic Bitches.

  35. 12th Man says:

    You seen this guy?

    Amari King, funny shit.

  36. 12th Man says:

    *Amiri King

  37. Berger says:

    12th- Kind of like this one.

    • 12th man says:

      No doubt there are bad cops, injustice, abuse of power, brutality etc.
      No doubt there are good cops, the majority, who do a dangerous, thankless job unappreciated by many, until they need help of course.

      The 2 videos show a different side to the public face of black lives matter and just as valid. They both told truth.

      The system needs an overhaul. Its too militarized, too confrontational in training. The system isn’t responsible for whatever actions you took that placed you in a situation to be abused at least in the vast majority of cases.

      I was taught there is a right way and a wrong way and you choose which.

  38. Nipper says:

    Lets send this topic over to the “other” blog and plague Skeebers and his weird friends.

  39. NoFear49er says:

    We agree on some things yet.

    You can help fix this downward spiral. Read the background, sign the petition.

    De Oppresso Liber



    • 12th Man says:

      This guy is getting bounced for pushing the Afghan cop trainer around? Even without the added reason of the little boy being raped, just pushing the guy around isn’t reason enough to be kicked out of the Army for a regular Joe never mind a decorated GB. What gives? Something more to this not in the story?

      • Berger says:

        He probably said something negative about O.

      • NoFear49er says:

        In today’s Army run by PC bean-counters it does make sense. Ass-kickers take a back seat to PC appeasers. One relief for cause letter in your record is all it takes if they want to make an example of you. The man put his hands on a muslim and the muslim complained. Man/boy rape/mother beating culture is ignored so condoned. Destroying a soldier’s career over it suits Obama just fine. More women in combat roles, that’s what’s important nowadays.

  40. snarkk says:

    What’s the deal with this replacing the sod about every 2 weeks or something? Somebody tell me this is normal, not normal for new stadiums that they use for Taylor Swift concert crap when the team is gone. How can any sod get rooted in 2 or 3 weeks time? If Jed is using this stadium as a cash cow for non-football, might as well put in that field turf crap…

    • 12th Man says:

      Snaark, the deal is that the County and City, as well as the Niners, all have rights to use the venue prior to the season. It is getting heavy use due to economics, it’s the first and only football stadium to be built with private financing which means it needs to generate more return.

      This is not only a “Jed is greedy” issue. Other agencies also have rights to stage events and have done so heavily. I guess its a choice between sub-standard field conditions in TC and pre-season or the State/County/City levying some kind of additional tax to partially pay for the stadium, but that scenario is unlikely anyway in todays economy in CA.

      There also is some underlying problem with the turf root structures growing horizontally and not taking a proper hold. I read they are importing sod from Chandler Arizona this time around for this 1 resurfacing.

      Fields do get new turf in normal use during a season largely depending on the weather in their region. The Niners just got another re-sod for this game and will get another before the season starts. Once the season has begun, no concerts or similar events can take place until after the SB.

      During the season last year, after they changed the base soil/sand mixture, the field held up pretty well. Hopefully once all the extra curricular stuff ends the field will hold up, just as the 2 practice fields have done during TC, with the same sub-soil/turf combinations.


  41. rtfirefly says:

    Bradford and Sanchez lookin’ good, this time against a good Ravens D. What is it about Chip Kelly and QBs and will it stand up in the regular season? So far in the first 5 qtrs. of preseason, he has 4 NFL caliber QBs. Sanchez misfired on a couple, but also had some good looking passes. Plus there seems to be receivers open everywhere against the Ravens.

  42. rtfirefly says:

    Now a punt return for a TD. The Eagles are kicking the Ravens butt in all three phases of the game: (to quote the guy who played Sing on TV) “offense, defense, and that other thing.”

  43. rtfirefly says:

    Their K, however, seems to be having problems making FGs and EPs. Look for Tebow to make the club as the designated two point and fourth and short QB.

  44. Nipper says:

    Practice games are a waste of energy. Most of those guys will not make the teams and the vets are on the sidelines praying they don’t get injured in the next practice game.

    • rtfirefly says:

      You can get a lot of indications of how and where a team is heading. When 1sts go up against 1sts, now for the most part in the 1st qtr, it’s almost like a real game. Also, you can see how top draft picks are going to be used. Remember, in the case of this game, the Eagles have an offense much changed in personnel. Bradford, no LeSean, Agholor at WR, and more. The early look is Kelly is crazy like a fox.

  45. Winder says:

    As far as I can see the world is turning to shit. There are people that do nothing but create chaos and hurt people with blink of an eye. That’s why football is a nice break even if just for a short while.

  46. Berger says:

    Game day today. I hope Kap plays a half. Hayne was fun to watch, would like to see more of him. I’d like to see more of Hyde. I’d sure like to see a pass rush. Skov had some great plays last week but had some terrible ones too. Would like to see more consistency. Can Harold make a tackle. He gets close but misses. Can Lemoneir force a run to go inside of him. Will the QBs have time to throw again. I sure wasn’t used to seeing that. Last week I was only worried about getting the ball snapped in a timely fashion. I’m not worried about that anymore.

    • 12th Man says:

      Tomsula said at his presser he will spread the carries around to see what the other RB have to offer.

  47. Berger says:

    I was thinking 10 wins this season until the Aldon debacle. I don’t know what to think now. I wish we would have kept Skuta. He was good. Watching Lemoneir is painful. I would cut him and put Tank at Elephant. We are deep at DL, this would be a way of keeping an extra one. And who would you rather see setting the edge and pass rushing, Lemoneir or Tank? I’d pity the RB who tries pick up Tank. He’d run him straight over and the QB be making quicker decisions. I would feel comfortable with an OLB rotation of Brooks, Lynch and Tank. Harold is too soft to be anything but a speed rusher for now. Maybe he just needs a year in the weight room.

    • 12th Man says:

      Lynch is back and already made an impact in practice

      • Berger says:

        I’m not a fan of keeping Lemoneir just because he is an OLB. We are much stronger at DL. I’d rather find a way to keep an extra D-lineman. Besides, I consider a pass rushing OLB a D-lineman anyway.

        One thing I will say positive about Lemoneir is he was standing up the guy in front of him last week. He could not do that last year. Problem is he just stood him up and could do anything else. He’s got to get up field to get the running plays turned inside. Aldon was a good as I’ve ever seen at that while still getting a pass rush. Brooks is great at that but sometimes doesn’t get much of a rush. I’m not sure about Lynch yet, I wasn’t paying attention. Skuta was good at both. Lemoneir batted down a pass last week when nobody blocked him. He is really good when nobody blocks him!

      • 12th Man says:

        Not a big fan of Lemonier either. He has had good opportunities to showcase himself but is practically invisible.
        Using Tank on situation rushing downs makes sense but I doubt he has much in the way of coverage skills. That’s a bust or boom strategy IMO.

  48. 12th Man says:

    Steve Logan breaking down playacting. Very interesting:


  49. 12th Man says:

    Playcalling, damn auto crap.

  50. 12th Man says:

    Maiocco: teams preferred Carrier over McDonald for a trade.

    Me too, I hoped he would win the #2 spot this year. I read some BS about the Niners could only get a 2017 pick for him. Turns out that is what Baalke asked for. Same as he did for the Andy Lee trade, as the Niners already have 12 picks next year and now 9 so far for 2017. Cap economics and team building through the draft 101.

    Now as for what he does with those picks….

  51. 12th Man says:

    Game day and for once the field at Levi will be in better condition after the game than before it due to the huge pile of Cowboy shit being dumped on it.

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