Headlines? We Don’t Need No Steenking Headlines

Time to roll the thread over. Not much happening til the draft in a month, so what do y’all want to talk about? Not much in the football world, unless you count the fact that RG III-XIII came up with his own personal logo, and Johnny Manzeill patented a couple of phrases.

  1. Obviously: “Johnny Football”
  2. Is the hugely dickish: “The House That Johnny Built”

Really? Hopefulluy he gets drafted by the Raiders, and he’ll change it to the masoleum that Johnny failed in.” Talk about painting a big giant target on your back, Johnny. No wonder 3/4 of all football fans want to watch you crater like the most recent flash in the pan, Tim Tebow.

Then again, I was kinda hoping Tim Tebow would come out of retirement to coin the phrase: “The Quarterback That God Built.”  Who said God was infallable?

Made the mistake of listening to Scott Bayless for 45 seconds this morning, and his quote was “All I know is whenever I see Johnny Football, he’s winning games. There’s no reason to doubt he won’t do that in the pros.” Skippy of course was the guy driving the Tim Tebow bandwagon. Straight into purgatory. Or the ESPN announcer’s booth. Kinda the same thing.

Perhaps Skippy forgot that Tebow (and Tim Couch, JaMarcus Russell, Vince Young, Ken Dorsey, yadda yadda yadda) all looked  like winners in college.

About unca_chuck

Lifelong SF 49ers, SF Giants, and Golden State Warriors fan
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53 Responses to Headlines? We Don’t Need No Steenking Headlines

  1. We’re on the eve of the greatest golf “toonament” in the world, and you want to hate on Johnny Football. You’ll live to regret that one. Trust me. Let’s have some fun today. Regale us with a funny golf story. I bet you got a lot of interesting stories about your ball landing in the road. Speaking of which, I don’t think we ever paid the respect due to the late great Harold Ramis and his “Caddyshack” among many others.

    I was watching “Family Guy” last night and it was the episode where they parodied the scene of Spalding wanting to order a hamburger. No. A cheeseburger. I want a hot dog. Anyway, as I always think. Parody? It’s a blatant ripoff. All MacFarlane does is repackage the funny shit that he watched as a kid growing up.

    I punch myself in the goddamn throat and laugh every time I watch that show thinking why didn’t I come up with that idea. I watched all the same funny shit he did growing up. How come I’m not a rich Hollywood big shot with his own TV show? Maybe lacking initiative and being the laziest sumbitch in the world has something to do with it.

  2. rtfirefly says:

    Blah, blah, blah. Tebow’s NFL record as a starter? 7-4 regular season. Win over the defending AFC champs IN THE PLAYOFFS and a playoff loss in Foxboro.
    But enjoy your delusions and your history revision. Inventing your own BS and trumpeting it as reality seems to give you great pleasure. Carry on.

    • unca_chuck says:

      IF he is so goodm why isn’t he playing in the NFL?

    • Tim Tebow won at every level he played at bar none. I think the reason he’s not playing in NFL now is there are too many holes in his game due to lack of early instruction (Makati, PI). That’s #1 = mechanics, lack of top competition and coaching all compounded as he got to higher levels of pro competition. Montana said that about the Niners prospects few years ago = “too many holes in this team” prior to Hendrix & co. Seems also true of TT but he did great with what God gave him and with the preparation & opportunities he had. #2 is motivation meaning TT proved to himself he can win at what he chooses to do by being pretty damn good in football. He’s going to be fine in the broadcast booth too as he’s already proven several times. He’ll be around and will be successful at whatever he chooses to do. With the right background I think he could have been a comparable leader to Jim McMahon (minus the anger/wackiness) = inspirational, clutch, a winner.

      BTW Tebow comes back over here every year (like Jimi in So. America) and works with the poor and needy in church related group activities which in a testimony to character.

  3. I believe Tebow has a career 8-6 starting record as a QB.

    But that .571 winning % is still better then the .544 sported by one Alex D. Smith.

  4. NoFear49er says:

    Chuck still has nightmares over the Broncos crushing defeat of the Jets and Tebow’s famous drive to the goal. Kiss your own biceps and it’s “what’s the big deal?” but point to the sky and Chuck’s eyes burn.

    Tebow’s the best passing fullback, hands down. The fact that Chuck throws hissy fits over it speaks to his personal demons not Tebow’s.

    • unca_chuck says:

      Right, NoFear. I don’t even know what game you are talking about. You obviously have a shrine built in your house with all 3 great game tapes of his stellar career. I don’t base my like/dislike of a player based on his religious views.

      By your rationale, if Alex Smith was more outspoken in his faith, you’d LOVE him to pieces. Good for you. I don’t roll that way. I’m not blinded by religion.

      It’s all a vast conspiracy that poor Timmy Teblow can’t get a job as an NFL QB. Keep on believing it’s his religiosity that keeps him in the announcer’s booth. Or on the back field throwing passes with Trent Dildo.

      Let’s see. 8-6 record, 47% completion rate, 75 QB rating. Lousy footwork, shitty form. Check. Yeah, the world should be beating a path to his ‘golden’ door.

      You and Skippy Bayless can hold a candlelight vigil til he parts Lake Michigan and signs with the Lions. They’ll of course change their name to the Christians in His honor.

      ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmen

      BTW Matt Snell threw a prettier pass than Tebow and he wass 1-3 with a pick.

    • unca_chuck says:

      You mean the drive where he parted the Jets defense like the Red Sea? Right.

      I guess God gave up on Tebow since he can’t get oin the field anymore.

      “Why hast thou forsaken me, Lord?”

      Jesus bore the cross. Tebow bears the ESPN announcer’s booth. Pretty much the same thing, eh?

  5. NoFear49er says:

    Don’t take it out on me, or Tebow, if you think God shortchanged you in your pathetic world. That’s your tough shit, and judging by your narcissism and other psychopathology on daily display here, you probably had it coming.

    • unca_chuck says:

      Funny what you glean from my posts, NoFear. You might as well be reading the Gnostics. It suggests something internal to me.

      Let he who is without sin . . . ?

  6. unca_chuck says:

    How do you feel about Johnny Football? 3rd rate shyster, or second coming (so to speak)?

  7. unca_chuck says:

    The point being, NoFear, is the amount of hand-wringing and folderol that surrounds a guy like Tebow. Most of it is self-generated.

    He’s barely a 3rd string QB, yet because of his outspokenness, he’s treated like a god (so to speak). To me he’s Clint Longley.

    • Nipper says:

      BLEEP!

    • rtfirefly says:

      Clint Longley was a star for one half of one MNF game against the ‘Skins.
      Tim Tebow took over a 1-3 team and led them to the playoffs FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FIVE YEARS.

      Just keep on with your idiotic view of Tebow, Chuck. You’re in good (?) company. How’s ol’ T-Rex’s choice of Sanchez for starter looking to the Jets now? How’d the Jets do in 2012?

      It shows your bias and makes it clear that NoFear is spot on on how the cross clouds your thinking.

  8. unca_chuck says:

    Who cares? Plenty of guys have shown some stuff playing, but in the end don’t make the grade. Longley being an example.

    Tebow can pray to the flying spaghetti monster for all I care. Why isn’t he playing for a pro team? The bottom line is if he was good, he’d be playing for someone. He’s not, so he isn’t. Get it?

    Answer me this. Do you seriously believe he’s not in the NFL because of his religious views? There are literally hundreds and hundreds of Christians (born again or otherwise) in every major sport. Why isn’t he playing?

    • unca_chuck says:

      Remember when black athletes were converting to Islam in the 70’s and 80’s? Was there backlash? Sure. Was Kareen Jabbar ostracized from the NBA? No. Or Bobby Jones (Ahmad Rashad) from the NFL? No. If you were good, the owners/GMs didn’t care.

      How I feel personally doesn’t fucking matter, skippy. I’m not keeping him out of the league. I think he’s wearing his religion like a cloak of invincibility. Does that mean I hate the guy as a player? No. I think he’s like Vince Young. A guy with some talent who isn’t doing what he can to improve his game. What did Kurt Warner do to improve? Went to the Arena League. What did Teboew do? Commercials about wanting to come back. You buy that? He turned down the QB job for the LA Kiss.

      Call that blasphemy if you will. I think it’s funny as hell that you see it that since I don’t like Tebow’s game, I’m anti-Christian. How tolerant of you. Praise the Lord. And pass the beer.

    • Nipper, I know this will disappoint you dearly, but I’m not drinking this month. The merry merry month of May will be a different story, however.

  9. rtfirefly says:

    It was Thangsgiving when Longley shone. I watched the game.

    I’m just pointing out the obvious blatant errors in your posts about Tebow. For all I know, he’s mucho happy with the $ and the girls that ESPN provides. Plus, he gets his pulpit to promulgate his beliefs.

    Culliver is a LOSER with a capital L. Tebow isn’t.

  10. philippinefan says:

    Gee now that I read down and see this topic extends down to here I should have posted my original answer (to RT) down here. Look up above- hey and point there too. It’s all good. I don’t think TT is a victim of anti-Christian bias but I do agree he’s proven to be a winner in his limited football career and will continue to do so in other areas of life. I think he’s a great guy who will do much good in the world wherever he is.

    • NJ49er says:

      He’s a highly marketable Christian that happens to play football.

      His problems aren’t about being Christian, he simply has mechanical problems playing the QB position.

      • unca_chuck says:

        Blasphemy. See ya in hell, NJ. Heaven sounds pretty fucking boring anyway.

      • NJ49er says:

        Most likely he’s done playing in the NFL Chuck.
        Highly doubtful he’s going to see another chance anyway.

        Especially with the depth coming into the League from this class of QBs.

      • Heaven, hell who knows? There’s plenty of both right here on our wonderful planet, enough for me anyways. Faith tells me there is ‘more’ beyond this but that’s just me. Some people believe in politics, poor souls, others in science, sex, drugs, what have you. But few of us are as marketable as Tim Tebow

  11. NJ49er says:

    Chuck if I were Aldon Smith, I’d seize the opportunity right now, to patent the ‘RG IV’ logo.

    Following his inadvertant foot to the RG III jewels last year, if an RG IV is still an option for the future, Aldon might have an option for a nice nest egg investment to fall back on 😀

  12. NoFear49er says:

    Tebow isn’t a victim of anti-Christian bias? from whom? with Chuck it’s obvious and undeniable despite his weak protests (Sharpton’s not a snitch either). If he weren’t his qualities and defects could be mentioned and debated without the always attached insults to God, religion, Christians and symbols of their faith. I think that’d be the very definition of Christian bias.

    If Chuckie had any guts he’d start a blog slamming Islam, Moslems, the Koran and Muhammad and bash every NFL player and coach who claimed such beliefs. But that’s not part of the lily-livered liberal agenda, and they are apt to retaliate for such insults whereas Christians are a safe bunch to bully, to a point.

    FYI: http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/football/nfl/gameflash/2011/11/17/4524/

    • NJ49er says:

      NoFear49er I happen to believe that Tebow has been given every opportunity to succeed as a QB because of his faith and Christian morals.
      Great role model IMO.

      Not sure why his faith even comes into question?

      With all the faint praises and gestures on display and, (over used by many an NFL player), I happen to think he’s one of the more genuinely Christian examples we’ve seen in the NFL.

    • Chucks opinion has no effect on Tim T. Neither does anyone elses IMO. Agree w/NJ that TT- he has been given opportunities in NFL because of his evident faith and good character (as far as we know). Do some not like him/it? Yes but Soooo? I venture to guess TT has more fans than not. No problem with any of this for me. So I say he’s not a victim not that ‘dislikers’ do not exist. They do. No big.

      • 12th man says:

        Tebow just wasn’t good enough down by down. I do think if he wasn’t so overtly Christian he would have had a longer shot at sitting on the bench learning but the distraction factor was way too high for a back up QB.

  13. 12th man says:

    This is an interesting piece about the running back position and how the Niners scheme is at a disadvantage, as are Gore and Hunter, running into stacked boxes on 95% of their carries.
    https://www.profootballfocus.com/blog/2014/04/09/the-impact-of-defensive-packages-on-yards-per-carry/

    • philippinefan says:

      This appears to be evidence the current RB scheme/attack has run its course for the Niners. So Will we try to be a little less macho = predictably smash mouth? NFL’s caught up with the college attack so dear to Jimi

  14. philippinefan says:

    Single high safety Scheme in the works as I anticipated? Also DB prospects in the draft.

    http://blogs.sacbee.com/49ers/archives/2014/04/single-high-new-cb-cook-suggests-changes-in-store-for-49ers-defense.html

  15. unca_chuck says:

    I prefer the flying spaghetti monster personally. Hell, I’m an ordained minister of the Church of Monday Night Football, so I go that going for me.

    If you had any sense, NoFear, you’d actually have some sense. Yes, your God is the only ‘correct’ god. Why is that? If everyone is right, then everyone is wrong.

    Tebow and victim in the same sentence. Wow. That’s stupid to the point of absurdity. Even for you. Read the Bible, skippy. You obviously haven’t. You may learn something. Jesus didn’t write the Constitution either. A bunch of agnostics did.

    Know what? Jesus never preached exclusion. You do. And so do a lot of so-called Christians. Then again, so do most other religions. Speaking of Jesus, you think he’s a Republican? Right. He was all about the money. Just ask the moneychangers. And ask Hannity. Jesus (like Santa) was a white guy. Funny, no?

    So, how did the Earth’s population start with two guys again?

  16. unca_chuck says:

    That’s blasphemy, Phil. Thou shalt always run against a stacked line.

  17. unca_chuck says:

    If you had any guts, NoFear, you’d come out from behind your veil of hatred and distrust.

    It ain’t 1953 anymore.

  18. Kap being investigated for sexual assault from a Miami hotel earlier this month.
    But Johnny Football is the bad seed. Our organization is a fucking laughingstock.

    Extend Harbaugh! Extend Kap! Extend the other end of the noose.

  19. I motherfucking loathe what’s become of this once proud franchise.
    We’re a motherfucking joke.

  20. Quinton Patton and Ricardo Lockette are also apart of the investigation.

    Niners and Seahawks joining forces as one. Gotta love brotherhood.

  21. unca_chuck says:

    The only joke is you, Dennis. Shut the fuck up and stop watching football or posting about it.

    You whine more than Bullit. Eddie D bought himself out of a rape charge. Then he got busted bribing someone for a liquor license. How about Jerry Rice cheating on his wife while she was in critical condition? Or Dwight Clark’s horrble acting career?

    Good to know where your delusions of purity come and go skippy.

  22. unca_chuck says:

    Kindergarten Ninja. Worst movie ever?

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0316111/plotsummary?ref_=tt_ov_pl

    I mean really. Blade Steel?

  23. unca_chuck says:

    New thread is up. Surprise surprise.

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